A Siren’s Tail excerpt for you…

A Siren's Tail2 smcopy

Hi! Delia here…

UGH! My indestructible fingernails clicked on the makeup counter as I considered a few alternatives. What to do? What to do?

Then voila! Something came to mind. Either go as I was or visit my two best friends and beg for help. Desperate…but these were desperate times. I picked up my smart phone and sent a text to the listing Witch Bitches. (I don’t care what Frankie says. I am witty.)

I thumbed in the message.

ME: Carrie, need a drastic favor.

Have to meet the band later and I look half  D. E. A. D.

Makeup help please?

. . . Have  you ordered your copy of A Siren’s Tail, Volume 2 in the Luna de la Mar Salon and Spa: As the Chair Turns series? After struggling with the formatting process on Amazon (which has never been a problem for me before – usually it’s with Apple) I think I might have all the issues resolved. Unfortunately, I’ve sold quite a few ebooks, already, with odd ball formatting.  Sorry.  I’m working on correcting this problem with a new formatting template I’m making for the future. Now do you want to read a little more?

Read on . . .

The return message tone beeped.

CARRIE: Come over. We’ll work a little magic 4 U

ME: Magic is exactly what I need. B right over

Since I discovered their secret, I affectionately refer to my witch bitches, Carrie and Jen, as the Witches of West Beach – because they live on the intercoastal side of our condominium instead of the ocean view side. Now I know why they usually personally prefer their own pale look against black. Occasionally, they add a little red for color. Jen wears short shorts with thigh highs. And when I say short shorts with thigh-high boots, I mean show-a-little-cheek length shorts, and wicked, studded, pointy-toed boots. Men love her hard-ass-mistress-of-the-night chain and leather look.

Carrie has the whole natural, witchy Stevie Nicks, seventies-hippie-gypsy-flowing-silk, beneath a leather bustier and lacy-thingy going on. She claims she has an aura very similar to Stevie’s. I’ll take her word for it since I don’t see auras. But I have to admit there is something haunting about Carrie. Sometimes I think it’s a glamour, but I’m not ready to mess with powers I know nothing about.

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Delia’s Next Adventure is Coming September 14th…

Delia Belaquoit was like any one of us—working hard, living her life, chasing her dreams, and achieving some modicum of success along the way. Great job, wonderful friends, singing in a band. She thought she’d hit the jackpot until everything she once believed in began to unravel…

Delia here… Hi, again! Magic does exist and people in Boca aren’t what they seem. Shh! No one is supposed to know.
When my former well-organized life blew up in my face, I decided I needed answers because the metamorphosis I’m undergoing isn’t following any known pattern. Remember when I used to be a sun worshipper? Now I’m exhibiting symptoms I don’t even want to think about.
Turns out there are certain aspects of my family tree that’re disrupting my humanity. Wait ’til I find my family. Just when I need answers, they disappear. Poof! Vanish. Except Edna, my great aunt. But she’s not talking. Some freakish sea monster stole her voice.
Unbelievable! Right?
They are all so in the doodoo doghouse for keeping everything from me.
Thankfully, my witch friends are charming me through my dilemma and our search for answers. Frankie, our alpha Werewolf boss, is doing his best to keep me safe. The guy is loyal to a fault, even if the wolf in him doesn’t have a faithful bone in his body. So when Aelric, my on-again-off-again-not-really-a-boyfriend, asked him to protect me from sources unknown, Frankie jumped on it. I still think he has ulterior motives.
I’m eventually planning a monogamous relationship, just not yet. Frankie wants to “turn” me, but the monthly waxing effort makes becoming one of his pack out of the question. Aelric, the handsome Coast Guard captain, did make a few serious romantic overtures and almost “sort of” proposed to me, but he hasn’t managed to take me on a first date yet. Nor has he told me exactly what he is. Hope springs eternal. Because he did kiss me senseless, wowed me with an impressive unspeakable power move, then left me again. Now I’m alone with more questions. But I’m determined to get my own answers and find out where the threat to my family is coming from.
Oh there’s more… It just gets better every day. Why don’t you hang with me and see what’s in the cards for this month? The supernatural salon and spa staff, as always, are here to help.”

#humor #fantasy #paranormal #shifter #vampires #faeries #witches #sirens #elves #aqua #sea #werewolves #hairstylists #werecats #sexy

Beyond the Halfway Mark

So August is well established and I need to make a mark to claim 2018! This could be it…

I’m looking at houses while waiting for a buyer for my place. God help me, yesterday I wanted to establish a buyer application. Title it: Are you qualified to buy this home?

Will you appreciate the trees.? Allow the frogs and lizards and bunnies to live unmolested?

The concerns go on and on. At what point did my relationship with this property turn from being a landowner to being the caretaker? A steward?

Can you risk selling your memories to a stranger who may not appreciate them? A tree you planted in memory of a birth? A bush to commemorate an anniversary? The house you can change but the living things here on this land depend on me to protect them. I respect their lives and independence so much that when we added on to the house, I moved the trees. They are thirty years older and much larger than they once were but they are my friends. I hope I find a buyer who will appreciate their cooling shade and constant presence.

Happy July Saving at SMASHWORDS My FREE and Discounted Books

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Magic is real. The fix is in.when Delia lands the hairdressing job of a lifetime. After one taste of faery nectar, the fae knowledge banks open to her. Who knew the town was filled with supernatural beings just fitting in? Frankie, her hot boss, is a Werewolf; the massage therapists are catshifters; her best friends are witches, and Delia likes being human. Her life is about to drastically change.

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Selling Our House and Downsizing Part 1

Those of you who have been reading my blog probably know I’ve been talking about this for several years. One of my daughters is a realtor in CO so thankfully I can get tips from her.

The big question everyone asks is where we plan to go. We have no plans, just ideas.

beach blue car combi
Photo by Nubia Navarro (nubikini) on Pexels.com

Plagued with the maladies of aging, my husband and I quickly discovered we weren’t capable of doing what we used to.  That’s a mind-blowing, daunting realization if you haven’t experienced it yet. Nevertheless, there were repairs and changes we wanted to make, but the house had ideas of its own, too. The  old grand dame needed sprucing up. She needed to shed some bloat: ie yard and attic cleanup. Thirty years of accumulated “stuff” ended up being packed away or in storage, dumped or donated.

woman in grey shirt holding brown cardboard box
Photo by bruce mars on Pexels.com

The old gal needed updating so we started with ” lipstick and make-up” in the kitchen. I wanted to make certain to keep the asking price within a realistic range so everything had to be in working order and in a livable condition with room to add personal touches of their own. I didn’t want to make expensive additions or decisions for the next family, but I thought it should have upgraded carpet and new granite counters in the kitchen. The appliances worked: the dishwasher and microwave were new, the stovetop would last a few more years, and the double oven is self-cleaning and in excellent shape. Both central AC units have been replaced within the last couple of years. The roof is brand new.  So the bones of the house are good, sturdy, reliable.

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What next? The next family have options to make it theirs and room to do it in. The one acre private lot in the heart of the county is accessible to the best schools and medical services. It’s not in the incorporated city and not in a gated community with HOA rules and fees. The layout is large and the rooms flexible. The place is comfortable, roomy, and, best of all, light, yet it still bursts with more untapped potential.

I originally took a 2K square foot ranch style home and designed it into a 4K square foot modern style, multi-level, open plan, and yet I can still visualize so many other options. After thirty years of maintenance, makeovers, and makeup, the right family will be pleased to liven up the once popular neighborhood gathering place again. The walls miss the sound of kids and teens and dogs barking. The pool misses the splashing and music. The yard misses the soccer balls and wedding tents, baby swings and tree forts. It’s time for someone to build that wooden walk among the tress along the creek and a gazebo in the front by the pond.

Even after purging the attic and closets twice there are boxes built up in the garage. Until we decide where and what we will live in, it’s impossible to know what we’ll keep and what we’ll give away.

I’m checking out RV living but where will I store all the stuff?

I’ve shown the house twice but it will take just the right family to be the perfect fit.

Next installment RVing after seventy!

Dizzy Writing Day Solutions

pexels-photo-271265.jpegToo much input. My internal computer is slowing down and freezing up. I’m suffering from scattered goals due to wind blown thoughts. I’m feeling like a disorganized airhead.

I can only fly (or write) by the seat of my pants so long  before my projects begin to weigh on me and bring me crashing to earth. The sooner I stop flapping and take control, the less weight I carry before I crash…and I minimize the injuries.

So what is my solution to regrouping? Lists. Calendars. Prioritizing. Organizing.

I pause. Put on some music. (Your choice.) Pick a good spot to sit or stand. Gather my stuff…

I go back to my old lists and gather them all together so I can reset. It’s my version of rebooting. I need a large surface to spread out my lists and various information. I’m definitely not as efficient as my computer. I check my phone notes and computer notes as well as my accumulated little notebooks. I pull out the sticky notes and gather my new blank sticky notes. I organize everything into piles (my filing system) until I can move them into an order of importance and create my new workload (my to do list).

A calendar is absolutely essential. One with room for details helps. If I could paint my walls with remarkable paint, I would create my life in washable markers where I can see it at a glance. Sticky notes, calendars, whiteboards, chalkboards, and daytimers are all electronic, so why am I less organized than ever? Too many apps. Too many options. I need my life in one place or fewer projects.

I attended a workshop last year and I’m thinking maybe I should actually implement the plan I started. I need to add open time I can move around in my calendar for unforseen calamities. I need catch up days for the internet being down, the grandchildren, time to smell the roses when my brain is fried, and a vacation from the plan.

All suggestions are welcome. Please comment with helpful tricks you’ve found effective. and thank you in advance.

 

What’s Your Pleasure?

Books? Paperback? Audio? Ebook? Audio is next…

Trade PAPERBACK available at CreateSpace

Hair of the WERE: Luna de la Mar Salon and Spa

Authored by Eliza March

 
List Price: $7.99
6″ x 9″ (15.24 x 22.86 cm) 
Black & White on White paper
164 pages
ISBN-13: 978-1717395429 (CreateSpace-Assigned)
ISBN-10: 1717395422
BISAC: Fiction / Romance / Romantic Comedy

Magic is real. The fix is in when Delia lands the hairdressing job of a lifetime. After one taste of faery nectar, the fae knowledge banks open to her. Who knew the town was filled with supernatural beings just fitting in? Rescued from a riptide by Aelric, a Coastie who looks like Thor, Delia is also being pursued by Frankie, her hot Italian boss. Unfortunately, he’s a Werewolf with a pack of females to look after. The massage therapists are catshifters, her best friends are witches, and Delia prefers being human, but her life is about to drastically change.

SMASHWORDS – Any of my ebooks, in all formats, are available for download

Dear Diary Post – The Day After

The day after a book release we sit and count the comments and bite our nails hoping this experiment works. It’s not about the money (Though who wouldn’t be excited about that?) It’s about the approval.

Writing is like giving someone a gift. You hope it’s a good choice. That they like it. That they can use it. That it’s exactly what they need at that particular moment.

I read Nora Roberts Whiskey Creek recently and gave out a sigh on the first page remembering why I enjoy reading her writing so much. It felt like coming home.

That’s why I enjoy writing. I want to give someone that experience of melting into my book. Escape from the moment.

I next turned to JR Ward’s The Chosen. Again, different author, different style, different genre…still that wonderful moment of escape. Relaxation. My drug of choice is reading.

This weekend, try something I wrote just for you. You can find something to take you away on my Amazon Author page.

 

Hand up or Hand out

I’ve been noticeably absent from my blog and the truth is I missed posting here. This is where my mind spills random thoughts I have had over night. Sorry, sometimes they’re worthwhile and sometimes not. Thi15894339_10207439635621634_2405261231259284669_ns week I hope I can provide you with something useful. Everyone either has a job, a child, a sport, or an interest they can write about. I thank the brilliant people who share how to’s on YouTube. We look up everything there. I could probably do open heart surgery following a heart surgeon video.

SO I’m thinking about adding my how to #selfedit lessons to YouTube. SO now there’s a whole new learning curve for me and another social media nut to crack. I write fiction and I love doing it. But if I spend all my down time researching, it will reduce my productivity.

Last weekend I attended a social media workshop I found extremely helpful. I think this is the second time I’ve gone to this one and just one of many Each time I learn something new. Each time I discover how many things have changed since the last time I attended a class on the subject. And within a few days I practice what I’m comfortable with and avoid branching out. I can tweak what I know without the hours of R&D I’ll need for a new venture.

I have a very old Twitter account. This week I had a better idea of what and why I was doing some things. I have an old Pinterest account that I like because I saved all the pretty pictures, and occasionally check out hot guys for inspiration. I am Eliza March and I like hot men. There you know my weak spot. I do not know squat about how Pinterest can be used for promotional purposes. I get the idea at first…but when I try to visualize what to do…poof…nadda.

Facebook is a bain on my peace of mind, sanity, and my ability to control my opinions… and I believe on most of their users too. I’ve been on it so long…I get it. Then I don’t. Then I do, then I don’t. If you’re anything like me, you don’t like being played. I could give you an arm’s length list of companies I deal with daily that are playing with my mind and my life. How do you trust any corporation in this day and time? I’m beginning to suffer from borderline #conspiracy theorist issues. Should I accept my $29.00 (not a real figure) royalty check and keep my mouth shut? I want more. I’m tired of being invisible, suffocated beneath other books, and authors buying reviews, promoters with money, algorithms and bots.

How can I help you? Apparently, those of us who band to together, and share information with each other, and help each other, and inspire each other can pull ourselves up the ladder and drag a few others with us. The stronger you are the more you should pull up with you. Never forget that someone helped you up too. We need each other more than you can ever imagine until that day come when you put your hand up and there’s no one there to rescue you.

Whatever goes around, comes around.

Are you enjoying the writing journey?

Have you met your goals? What do you do when you succeed? Or fail? What about when you disappoint yourself? Beat yourself up for not being dependable? I have a confession… rainbow_stage_spotlights_vector_background_529094-copy


 It’s October? OMG – How did I get here and how did I get side-tracked from my writing goals? One thing that interferes with getting my writing done is having more pressing issues that keep popping up, forcing me to re-prioritize.  My family’s needs always take priority over everything else, and my uncle has decided to move into assisted living. With no children of his own, I’m trying to help him find a suitable place near his friends. It’s giving me good practice for finding out what I will want when the time comes for me and my husband. But it’s time consuming and distracting.

“Hair of the Wolf” is late. I’m beating myself up over not meeting the goal for a planned  September release. The first humorous paranormal book in my As the Chair Turns series should have been released by now, but Irma showed up and blew (pun intended) that and several trees in my yard all to hell.

My house is way too large for my husband and I to maintain. We were ready to downsize and reduce the stress in our lives. Half our belongings are in boxes. We installed new flooring, new roof, and updated the kitchen and the bathrooms. There’s still more to do and, now after this hurricane season, there’s more. I also planned to put “said” home on the market last month. Real retirement is beginning to feel like an illusive dream.

Needless to say, my plans have changed. But although we had no firm plans in place for moving on, we did have a few dreams; so now, frustration is setting in.

Since I’m not wealthy enough for my writing income to take precedence over my other sources for paying the mortgage and bills … such as emergency hurricane preparedness and cleanup, I need an alternative vision. I edit part time, mentor/coach part time, work as a hairdresser part time, and then write. So writing comes last, and money that I’d like to spend for promotion and advertising is being gobbled up in daily living expenses.  I am not the only author suffering from this dilemma.

What I’ve decided to do is stop setting “firm” goals for my release dates and avoid the guilt. I have at least eight books in progress at this time, and because I value good story and character development above churning out crap, I am taking a step back.

One of the observations I’d like to make for writers is that you should set your own pace. Yes, the authors who are releasing quickly and often are having success, but don’t sell your work short. Don’t self criticize because you take more time to tell the story the way you want to. Do it your way in your own time.

The self-publishing market makes it difficult to rise above the algorithms, keywords, and massive numbers of releases daily. What I see are opportunists, sharks feeding on minnows, finding a way to make more money for themselves without a care to the quality of what they turn out or how they affect the market in general.

Are we dumbing-down literacy? Yes. And genre fiction. The Chicago Manual of Style reviews editing rules about once a year because colloquial language and needs within the US are changing with the speed of social networking. There are age-gapped and style changes taking place every day. English, in all its forms, has different rules around the world, but in addition to that, I believe, fiction in (American) English is being swamped by books published with little, no, or unprofessional editing.  The results are chilling.

Incorrect uses of tense, words, phrases in books and TV, social media, and radio infiltrates our daily experience. Which came first? Does it matter? The results are the same. Confusion and inconsistencies. Authors who discard the rules and, through advertising and promotion, convince readers it doesn’t matter.

To each her/his own. I can’t live with “incorrect” or inconsistencies in my books. And believe me they have them. But I strive to improve with each book I write, because, as in all art, fiction and novels are a personal matter of taste. Correct language, grammar, and punctuation is not. Dialogue can be true to form, narrative can not.  An author can maintain her or his voice without compromising quality editing.

Be careful when comparing your goals, needs, and successes with other peoples’. Be good to yourself. Enjoy the journey no matter where it takes you.

 

Eliza March's Official Author Weblog

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